Mom's crystal punch bowl full of pecans from my tree
I can’t tell you how many clients I’ve had with a garage full of stuff they inherited from a loved one. These items represent a mix of emotions – memories good and bad; guilt about wanting to reclaim the space they occupy; fear that they will accidentally discard a priceless heirloom. The keepsakes’ current owners – guardians, really — are paralyzed with indecision. Sometimes their home is decorated with grandma’s artwork and accessories, which are not reflective of their own taste. Some are seeking moral support during box-opening time, not remembering what’s in the boxes and anticipating a flood of emotions. Once the last flap is lifted, though, often as not, the reaction is, “What the heck is that?!”, and laughter ensues.
Just imagine if you died today. You haven’t yet de-cluttered your life, and you haven’t left instructions about what to leave to whom, and for what reason. So someone else – probably your kids – will have to decide. How are they supposed to know that you hated the painting that always hung in the living room, and only kept it because YOU inherited it and kept it out of guilt? Or that box of linens/knick-knacks/clothing/etc. — Was it packed up because you loved it? Or because you hated it and never got around to deciding what to do with it?
Mom's cedar chest used for storage and as a TV stand
One thing that I feel strongly about is that one should USE inherited items, REPURPOSE them, or DISPLAY them in a place of honor (the ones that you love and that have meaning for you, that is). If it’s so special, why is it out in the garage, in a box, where it may be deteriorating, and you can’t even get to it, much less enjoy it?
Mom's sewing box used as a side table
I’ll use myself as an example: My mom died 10 years ago. Among the things I inherited were her cedar chest, crystal punchbowl, and sewing box. She originally used the cedar chest as traditionally intended, to collect items for her wedding trousseau (personal and household items collected by a bride-to-be). I use it to store my own memorabilia, and also as a TV stand. The punchbowl – when am I ever going to make punch? — I use as a fruit bowl, usually, and in the case of the photo, as a bowl for pecans from my tree. The sewing box holds my own sewing supplies, and doubles as a side table in my living room, with – voila! – a hidden stash of remote controls inside.
Holds my own sewing supplies and hides remote controls!
The point is that I USE these things and enjoy them in my everyday life. They are not languishing in a hot, dirty, critter-infested garage or storage shed. I do have a bin full of items that do not suit my taste in décor, and that I am not currently using. But it does not impact my ability to live a clutter-free life, or banish my second most expensive possession (my car) to the mercy of the elements.
Are you leaving a legacy? Or are you leaving a liability?
Related flow chart: The Keepsake Clutter Flow Chart, available here.
Copyright 2011 by Hazel Thornton, Organized For Life.
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Tags: clutter-free, flow chart, garage, guilt, keepsakes, repurpose
February 22, 2012 at 6:02 pm |
Great post. I so wish my brother could read some like this and be moved to let go of all that is in his front room, which despite it’s sunny aspect gets used as a store room for Mum’s stuff. She died 15 years ago. He hung on for years incase he married and his wife wanted some of the goodies. Well she has taken bits and pieces but would rather have the room but still he won’t let go. He uses the excuse of a busy life now. She will probably only be able to let go when he dies, if it is before her. Very sad.
February 22, 2012 at 6:29 pm |
Thanks, Cherrie! You could easily forward this post to your brother for motivation. And my Keepsake Clutter Flow Chart (see the link above the egret logo) provides direction for deciding and letting go, but (as you know) he’s got to want it. Hard to tell what his motivation is, or what will help. I promise he won’t forget his Mum (or disappoint her) if he clears that room out so he can have a better life with his wife!